My commitment to myself is to not settle for less than this as I have before, which means (in my language/paradigm) they are more than wants or needs, they are requirements.I trust that this is possible, that I deserve it, am capable of this kind of relationship, that if I don’t settle for less I will find my soul mate and experience this kind of relationship.After my last divorce I thought I met my soul mate but that relationship ended after 5 years.
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Your search to find your special someone can be frustrating and time consuming.
This is why many singles like you despair that it will ever happen - and they give up or settle for someone who isn’t right, and ultimately end up living a lonely and unsatisfying life.
I broke off that relationship August 2007 and posted my profile on several internet matchmaking websites determined to find my soul mate or be alone. I needed to learn that love doesn't conquer all and that not all problems are solvable.
November 2007 I composed the below statement of my requirements and what I was seeking and even published them in my newsletter and excerpted below: In my life I've struggled to understand love and relationships, not having a good start growing up, which propelled me into my profession as a Marriage and Family Therapist and Relationship Coach. While I’m quite competent helping others I’m still on the path of find lasting love for myself. I thought I was more conscious in my second marriage, but being in love caused me to ignore many obvious red flags.
My best friendships and relationships are with people that are able to practically see inside me and understand where I’m coming from.
My most difficult relationships are with people that see me through filters so opaque with their own stuff that my good heart and intentions are unseen. I require a relationship that brings out the best in me as I bring out the best in my partner.
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Being older didn't make me wiser, and being a therapist didn't give me an edge in making that marriage work.