Please don't spend years of your life wondering what could/would have happened with someone who selfishly wanted you but not enough to disrupt his life. Without honesty DH and I would not have been able to start this process. I think there has been a bit of confusion as I wasnt very clear in my OP.If you have realised your DP is the one you want then you should probably view your fling as a blessing in disguise. If I had been honest sooner and told him I was unhappy before I started the affair I would have saved us both a huge amount of pain and anguish. It probably wont alleviate your guilt but at least the lies can stop along with the affair. The fling is the guy who has been on and off for last 18mths.
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he pulled out all the stops - booked us into relate, really fought for our relationship and that made me realise what i meant to him. i left work - (it was a colleague i had been seeing) and concentrated on putting our marriage back together. i think you need to be sure that what your doin is the right thing for guilt to fade Is a very good piece of advise.
that was 15 years ago and we are still together, married almost 19 years. I did try an d end it with current DP as felt so guilty.
it was painful and horrible and there fault on all sides, but i can honestly say he has never once thrown it back at me, and we drew a line under it a long long time ago. It was only then I realised what I stood to lose and who I should be with helpme I'm going to be really blunt here but this is from personal experience. My relationship with dh was only saved because he finally came clean. Best control its release otherwise it will be controlling you and your bf. I had a love affair - a fling makes it sound frivolous and it wasn't - but MM wasn't prepared to leave his family. I felt I owed it to DH to try to repair our marriage before I made any decision about my future. He was amazing and has helped me cope with my grief and shame.
If the other man wanted to be with you, he would make it happen. When he did, I felt I had already known it at some deeper level. We are still in a terrible place, it hurts horribly but we are communicating again better than we have in years. You said if you were single in 10 years and the om was you'd go back to him. If you can't be the girlfriend your boyfriend deserves then you should end it.
This guy and I have huge history spanning several years and we missed the boat to be together. I know he wont leave her and if he ever did the consquences to both our lives would be devasting.
I feel awful for what I have done to my lovely boyfriend.
Alternatively, break it off with both of them (telling neither of them) and have a break before making a fresh and unhindered start with someone new because quite honestly, it sounds like an unhappy mess with no obvious cure. Your boyfriend has another partner, but you feel guilty about your fling. Your boyfriend likely entered into this affair with the presumption that you wouldn't be sleeping with others and potentially bringing 'a gift' to the relationship. Sometimes there were gaps of months in between our contact. Begging for some advice on how to get our house to sell... I don't shower every day, and wash my armpits every other (24hr deo) Manager won’t let me go to my wedding Would this bother you?
He has a girlfriend and there was never any guilt on myside as she used to be a friend who really treated me very badly when I was at my lowest. Secondly I cant risk the other mans GF finding out as it would wreck some of our mutal friendships (and some of my professional relationships). Wedding To not know what to make of my DH saying this every morning...
After a long time of hoping and praying, hoping and praying, hoping and praying, and trying to be optimistic, I feel like I have really hit rock bottom. The taste of motivational thoughts, sayings, videos, etc only last so long, and then reality hits once again with anothe rejection or dissapointment. There is little change or progress after so much effort, and I feel so hurt and betrayed, abandoned and alone.