We have the solution not only with these dirty sexy quotes, but also with this guide.
They are both startled and he says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me." She replies, "if your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 1221."Bill and Marla decided that the only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 10-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony and order him to report on all the neighborhood activities.
As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast.
"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk -you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest. On her way, she tiptoed by her oldest daughter’s bedroom and heard her screaming.
The mother thought to herself, “That’s normal, especially on her wedding night.” She snuck by her second oldest daughter’s room and heard her laughing. Finally, she slipped by her youngest daughter’s room where she didn’t hear a peep, but she thought nothing of it.
The man, seeing that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our family.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, then looked up at his father.“Why do you want money if you already had some? “Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do,” the little boy replied. " The mother replies, "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it." "You're wasting your time," said the boy. " The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours." The guy left.A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut? 500 per hour.”“Oh”, the little boy replied, with his head down. The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. Moral: It’s just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life! ” The father furiously said, “if the only reason you asked about my pay is so that you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or other nonsense, then march yourself to your room and go to bed. I work hard every day and do not like this childish behavior.”The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.The next morning in the kitchen, after the husbands had gone out, the woman asked her eldest daughter about last night’s noises. “You always said if it tickled, I could laugh,” she answered.