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If they're unhappy, they begin wondering ' Do I want to spend the next 20, 30 or 40 years with this person?
I'm middle-aged and I'm still attractive. Maybe I can find somebody better'.'' Another factor is the changing view of divorce itself.
'' It's absolutely more difficult for women who get divorced economically,'' said Ms. '' Study after study shows that the standard of living drops for a woman after divorce and the standard rises for men.'' Many divorced women ''are left with a house that's difficult to afford.
As a result there are hidden pockets of poverty everywhere, including Fairfield County,'' Ms. A 1989 study jointly published by the Connecticut Women's Education and Legal Fund, the Permanent Commission on the Status of Women and the Women's Research Institute of Hartford College for Women found that the mean per capita income of Connecticut women following divorce dropped 16 percent while that of divorced men increased by 23 percent. A June 1996 study published in the American Sociological Review indicated that a woman's post-divorce standard of living decreased by 27 percent while that of a divorced man rose by 10 percent.
After my divorce, some friends continued to include me.
But unless you connected with a new man very quickly, you become a fifth wheel,'' she said. Kloss got a teaching job in Milford and moved to Westport -- a community, she said, where ''there were many singles and more opportunities to meet them.'' Added to invisibility is economic duress -- particularly for divorced women, many of whom remain in suburban or exurban areas to provide safe environments and good schools for their children.Often, they don't have a ready framework for replacing those networks.They don't know how to get invited to dinner parties or how to host them.If you do the math, women and kids come up with fewer resources,'' said Ms. Moreover, many middle-aged and older women today took time out from their jobs to care for children as well as for elderly members of their families.Those lost years in the work force place women at a disadvantage.'' You lose your community, your friends, your communal identity, and sometimes even your children. '' Some of your friends drop away because they're married and you're not.